It is like we are all constantly chasing that feeling of happiness. To feel that we have reached our desired destination. To finally feel "happy".
You are a lot tougher than you think and you really do deserve great things. Right now it feels like the world is against you.
He knew my past, he knew my insecurities, he knew how to use it against me and at the time, I believed him. After all, who would want someone like me?
Don't settle for anything less.